SSDD: Same Shit, Different Decade

Batman finds your lack of faith disturbing!

Akira's date of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics is WRONG!

ANI-MOVIES, *Frozen II

Being one of the "official" theatrically released sequel to one of their prior animated movies, Frozen II was a sure bet to cash on the intense success of the original. While other Disney sequels like Return To Neverland or Jungle Book 2 were shown in theatres, they were considered not part of the regular features produced by the main Disney studio, making The Rescuers Down Under the only other film to be branded under their main studio lineup. So no made-for-TV production was included in this, despite the fact there had already been two other Frozen short follow-ups made prior to this, taking place in between both movies.

Three years have past in the kingdom of Arendelle, and Elsa is still queen(despite the fact that she still gets listed as being a Disney "Princess"), however she is bothered by an enchanting voice that only she can hear. Suddenly, unearthly entities force the citizens out of their home, so its up to Elsa and Co. to enter the enchanted forest to find some answers. The forest has been sealed off from the rest of the world for a while, but Elsa's power manages to pierce the misty veil. Our heroes learn that a group of royal soldiers have been living an uneasy alliance with the native Northuldra people. The land is watched over by four elemental spirits: a fiery little salamander, a living gust of wind, a wild kelpie, and a clan of stone giants. Elsa and her sister Anna also learn that their mother was a native of the forest, making the two of them a bridge between the magic the Northuldra could synchronize with. The sisters also uncover the shipwreck that took their parents, and for the purposes of this movie it seems that they were not originally on their way to Rapunzel's wedding from Tangled Ever After, but instead looking for an island across a short sea that was the source of this uneven magic. What follows is a painful revelation of the dangers fear between different cultures, plus Kristoff's refusal to just grow a pair and ask Anna to marry him! Also, Olaf is still pointlessly annoying, but not in a full-on Jar Jar Binks way.

Frozen II works as a feast for the eyes, and for quality in modern 3-D animation. The fault though lies in giving an explanation to Elsa's ice powers, but leaving even more questions involving her parents, and why they their past a secret from their daughters, a plotline probably left dangling if they ever decide to do a third movie. Most of the songs(including Kristoff's 80s power ballad)are very entertaining, despite the fact that Disney seriously tried to remake Let It Go with Into The Unknown. It's easy to see why Disney decided to make this a theatrical release as opposed to a Disney Channel original or made-for-video production, but mostly sticking to their safety zone of continuing the prior story in a similar light. There was lots more room for showcasing misunderstandings being a huge source of conflicts as opposed to having any real existing typical Disney villain, which makes it slightly disappointing that the plot kept shifting from different character motivations instead of a standard fantasy journey.

René Auberjonois, R.I.P.

The entire social network is just one big Kobayashi Maru, and nobody has the Captain Kirk cheat codes!

Remember, in comics, it's not about who dies. It's about who STAYS DEAD!

ANI-MOVIES, *Wonder Woman: Bloodlines

Done as both a prequel and continuation of all the current DCAMU titles, Wonder Woman's new solo adventure has her introduction to the post-Flashpoint timeline. Bloodlines(no relation to the 90s DC Comics event), has a brief rundown of Amazing Amazon's secret origin, while finally giving her rogues' gallery center stage.

Set just before Justice League: War, Princess Diana of the Amazons rescues pilot Steve Trevor from an early swarm of Parademons dispatched prior to Darseid's main invasion. Diana leaves Themyscira with Steve, and becomes an advocate for the American military while adopting the superhero identity of "Wonder Woman". While getting her bearing in Man's World, Diana moves in with archaeologist Julia Kapatelis and her daughter Vanessa. Their live-in relationship has Julia enthralled with Diana's history, while giving Vanessa the short end of the stick. Timeskip five years where Wonder Woman is now a member of the Justice League, and learns that Vanessa stole an ancient relic from business mogul, Veronica Cale, leaving Julia asking Diana for her help. Wonder Woman and Steve find Vanessa trying to pass the relic to villainous Dr. Poison, who brought Giganta along to act as her muscle. During the fight, it seems as if Julia is shot, and her last request is for Wonder Woman to rescue her daughter. Vanessa now blames Diana for her mother's death, and pledges to help Poison and her partner Dr. Cyber in their new gang of bad girls, Villainy Inc. Wonder Woman finds out that Vanessa has ambushed some of Cyber's couriers in the Middle East, and upon confronting her is shocked to Vanessa's reveal as the metallic-winged Silver Swan. Swan is defeated by Diana, and is taken to Veronica Cale's skyscraper where its revealed that Vanessa new cybernetic enhancements are replacing all her flesh with nano-technology. Diana figures she needs to find Themyscira as their tech could completely heal Vanessa, but both she and Steve forget where the island is due to a special magic used to protect its location. Diana, Steve, and their friend Etta Candy journey to the labyrinth of the Minotaur where an enchanted fountain grants divine knowledge. After having a brief scrape with a now pumped-up Cheetah, Wonder Woman uses the fountain to get a clue of where Paradise Island is, and destroys the fountain which frees the Minotaur from its curse which compelled him to guard the labyrinth. He pledges to become Diana's personal "Alfred", and is given the name Ferdinand. Team Wonder than goes back to Cale's office to figure out where Themyscira is, only to find out that Dr. Cyber hacked into their security system, and learns where the Amazons' island is. This leads to a large tangle between Cyber and Poison's huge ace in the hole for taking on an island filled with immortal warriors.

Bloodlines helps revitalize Wonder Woman's position as a mainstay in the DC Universe, mostly because of the upcoming "prequel", Wonder Woman 1984. It focuses more on the character's ties with the rest of her own main cast, but her rivalries with her mortal(and immortal)enemies. There is also more focus on developing relationships in the main Wonder Woman family, like Diana and Steve's resurfacing romance after Wonder Woman stopped dating Superman, or Etta Candy's fondness for Amazons being polyamorous. The animation is up to the normal specs of your average DC Animated Movie Universe title, but does feature slightly better fight choreography since Wonder Woman is a warrior first and foremost. For longtime fans of DC's premiere superheroine, this should meet their standards even if they're not all that into the extended DC Comics lore.

Ugh! The Monday after a 3-con weekend.

OBSCURE O.V.A.S, *Hazbin Hotel

In production for several years, Hasbin Hotel is a crowdfunded pilot/ONA movie created by Vivienne Medrano(also known as "VivziePop"). Originally starting her career from doing webcomics like Zoophobia, she also created several short animated films for various school thesis. From there, she gathered a large following conceiving her supernatural comedy about life in Hell. The pilot has gone on to be one the most talked-about animated projects in internet history.

Set in modern day Hell, the princess of the underworld, Charlie, is under the impression that Hell is in fact a "temporary" placement for souls outcast from upstairs, so she sets up a hotel meant to rehabilitate souls in the hopes of ascending. Despite the stunning Disney Princess-esque music number she performs on live TV to pitch her idea, nobody seems to give into her idea. This and her sole patron Angel Dust is not really as noble as he seems when its shown he's currently involved in a turf war between two of Hell's finest. Charlie's friend/partner Vaggie is pissed with Angel on how he made their promotion look bad, but the hotel regulars are visited by the charismatic but overtly sketchy Alastor, also called "The Radio Demon". The pinstriped fast-talking Alastor is an infamous figure in Hell, and despite that seems to want to help Charlie operate her hotel. Vaggie is profoundly skeptical about Alator's true intentions, but Charlie arranges for him to bring in a cycloptic neat-freak and an alcoholic winged cat as acting hotel staff. From there, it appears Alastor has his own agenda for what direction this new "Hazbin Hotel" will take, even though he protects it from invading gangsters like the snakeman, Sir Pentious.

Hazbin Hotel struck the internet like a comet through a wet paper bag, and has gained an unwavering select group of fandom not seen since Homestuck. The animation is very much in the style of shows like Ren and Stimpy and Invader Zim, while giving separate homage to old Terrytoons similar to like the hit Cuphead game. There are catchy music numbers in the spirit of songs from the Disney renaissance, although it should be made apparent that this is not intended for younger audiences. There is a free spoken approach in the dialogue and subject matter, but not intended to offend any specific social group or lifestyle. If anything, its one of the more open-minded projects as it has openly gay, pan-sexual, and asexual themes, which doesn't triangulate itself making viewers think that "only gay people go to Hell". The pilot is currently not picked up by any specific network or major backer, even though chances are that with the spinoff web series of Helluvaboss will help it gain even more notoriety.

Atlanta Atari

G1 Entrapdak Vs. Scorptra

Madame Razz has precog-senility.

ANI-MOVIES, Lego DC Comics Super Heroes: Aquaman-Rage of Atlantis

With a new live-action solo movie on bubbling to the surface, Warner Bros. decided to release a new animated movie based on their King of the Seven Seas, but instead of new DCAU title, they fell back on their kid-friendly Lego line. Taking place in the same continuity as the Lego Batman video games and Lego DC Super Hero animated specials, Rage Of Atlantis combines two unusual corners of the DC Universe, their underwater adventures with cosmic odysseys.

Justice League noob Jessica Cruz is the new Green Lantern on the block, and alerts the rest of the League that super-strong space bounty hunter Lobo is raiding a government facility jammed with dangerous alien tech. Aquaman down in Atlantis gets wind of this and heads arrives on the scene first, but his water powers aren't all that useful in a desert landscape. The League arrives to pull Aquaman's fat out of the friar, but Lobo makes off with a mysterious orb. Aquaman takes the League back to a celebration to his kingdom of Atlantis where Batman is surprised to find out that he's not only married to the lovely waterbender Mera, but that his half-brother Orn is the devious Ocean Master, even though he doesn't seem to have started his bad guy career as of yet. Ocean Master shows them a forged document of the Atlantis laws showing that Aquaman can't be king because he's only half-Atlantean, and convinces the other sea folk to make him their new leader thanks to a rage-inducing Red Lantern power battery after secretly teaming up with the Reds leader Atrocitus. Orn has Aquaman and the League locked up, but our heroes manage to breakout, and discover the Red Lanterns are planning an Earth invasion using the mind-controlled Atlanteans as their army. Everyone but Green Lantern escapes to an alien world near a red sun, which instantly robs Superman of his powers. So a distraught Aquaman pulls his act together to find Lobo at a literal local watering hole, and convinces the Kiss Army reject to help them free Atlantis after Lobo learns his "space dolphin" buddy Fishy(a genuine DC Comics character!)who has also under Atrocitus' control. Meanwhile, Jessica Cruz teams up with Batgirl and the current Robin to preventing the Atlantean's land invasion while the Justice League destroy's the Red Lantern battery, and Atrocitus' plan to drain the planet of all water thanks to a colossal drinking straw!

The story fits to most standards of the DC Comics Lego productions, taking obscure things from the comics lore and bringing them together for a enjoyable family picture, but still manages to shoehorn the needs for characters like Superman and Wonder Woman using pimped out vehicles despite their ability to fly. The dub has Troy Baker back as Batman, Teen Titans Scott Menville as Damien Wayne/Robin, Jonathon Adams returns from the Green Lantern cartoon as Atrocitus, and former-Wonder Woman Susan Eisenberg as Mera. If you're a regular fan of the Lego pictures, or a hardcore DC reader, than this is worth at least a once-over.

Did you seriously just use the term "spooktacular"?

Dracula will sing you the song of his pipples

Halloween III: Living proof that Terminator and Robocop are both in the same timeline!

ANI-MOVIES, *Batman And Harley Quinn

Intended to be a continuation of the 90s Batman: The Animated Series, this crossover is more of a Bruce Timm project set in a similar universe giving reference to DC Comics concepts like the Justice League or parallel universes. Given the rising popularity of Joker's ex-girlfriend/punching bag, Harley had gained enough success in her own on-again/off-again title, as well as several specials and mini-series. So, making an entire animated project around her was somewhat inevitable.

Even though its in its own timeline, the movie sets out sometime after the finale of the Justice League Unlimited TV show. The Floronic Man is a dryad that was exiled from another dimension, and one of the few DC characters that has access to a plant source of energy called The Green. He teams up with Poison Ivy to come up with a formula that would transform everyone on Earth into plant people similar to Swamp Thing. The veggie villains kidnap a scientist under Ivy's influence to help them. Batman gets wind of this, and sets Nightwing out to look for Ivy's old bad girl buddy, Harley Quinn, who at this time has cut off all ties with the Joker and worked out a meager living as a version of "herself" at a superhero cosplay cafe. She and Nightwing have a brief tiff just before they end up making out a little, and Batman picks them up to look for one of Ivy's old henchman at a bar for super-minions. The new Dynamic Trio confront Ivy and Floronic Man where they kill their captive as they escape. Batman, Nightwing, and Quinn conclude that their floral foes plan to release their virus in the same swamp where Swamp Thing was created, and once there Harley manages to appeal to Ivy by giving her a "boo-hoo" face. Floronic Man gets a hold of the finished formula, and just before he releases it into the water to contaminate the world, Swamp Thing himself appears to make the most completely unnecessary cameo, leaving Batman to just set Floronic Man on fire. Quinn then gets her own talk show where people have to run their own Double Dare course in order to get psychological help.

Batman And Harley Quinn functions fairly well as a single Batman story, although there's alot of inconsistencies if your trying to fit in the original DCAU. One is the flashback scene from Batman Beyond: Return Of The Joker showing Harley getting back together with Joker. Another is no mention of Tim Drake or Batgirl, plus no assistance from any of the Justice League just because Nightwing thinks most of the heroes available were annoying. I know this is intended to be a slight spoof of the whole DC Universe, but if some supervillain is planning on turning everyone in the world into plant people, then you'd think Batman would get over his annoyance with second-string heroes like Booster Gold! Despite its lack of catering to comic fans who actually appreciate the concept of continuity, it makes for a humorous viewing for hardcore Harley lovers.

MISC. MANGA, *Blade Bunny

Going back to their manga roots, Antarctic Press returned to doing black-and-white comics in their 90s Bad Girl-themed Blade Bunny. Writer Eric Kimball and artist Erwin crafted this fan service favorite set in a world packed with otaku tropes.

Bunny(also known as "Hare")is a lean ninja girl who happens to wear a pair of costume bunny ears. She gets hired to take out a wealthy lord, but is chased by the robotic assassin called Wolf Fang. She's rescued by the dragon Ao-Lung, and Bunny is then tasked to recover a mystical pearl. Bunny heads out with the dragon's pupil, the slinky Kyoto who has some supernatural moves of her own. After ditching a robot gunslinger, the two ladies arrive at the temple where the pearl was kept. They encounter the youth Jin who seems to be under the care of the temple monks, but is really this important immortal that currently has the pearl when everyone else but Bunny figured out where the pearl was. The electric cowboy rejoins them after failing to impersonate the head monk, and a handsome guy Bunny had her eye on turns out to be possessed by a demonic spirit that wishes to corrupt Jin's immortality.

The series was split into two volumes, 5 issues in the first and 11 in the next. This is slightly done because the first volume seems like a clean cut first entry in an anime series, while the second volume trails off into more of a character introspective with the supporting cast. The strange curve comes from Bunny's bizarre ability to know that the world she lives in is actually fictional, sort of like Deadpool but using her insight to further the plot. There's even a part where Bunny is thought to be killed off, so Kyoto dreams up a ghost version of her to give her advice until the real Bunny reappears. It can become an almost Douglas Adams-type of storytelling mixing in with a Go Nagai inspired manga.

ANI-MOVIES, Twice Upon A Time

An early 80s movie that in its own way ahead of its time, as well as slightly behind them, Twice Upon A Time was a cutout animated feature-length film that took the best of what Terry Gilliam did for Monty Python, and what might eventually influenced future projects like South Park. This modern day fairy tale done in the spirit of Little Nemo In Slumberland was produced by George Lucas right of the heels of finishing up the original Star Wars trilogy. It didn't get much exposure in theaters during its initial release, but gained much attention from its later screenings on HBO, making it a cult classic similar to other 80s animated films.

In the "real life" land of Din, it's inhabitants known as Rushers live out their daily lives rushing around, but they sleep thanks to an ordinary wall clock called the Cosmic Clock, and their dreams are distributed by the small wizard Greensleeves and his figment creatures. The sleazy Synonamess Botch wants to replace the Rushers' dreams with nightmares that are carried out by his vile vultures. Botch kidnaps Greensleeves, with hopes of getting a magic spring in the Cosmic Clock to stop time. Meanwhile in the dream-making realm of Frivoli, the silent Mumford and Ralph the All-Purpose Animal(a shape-changing doglike creature)are demoted to taking out the trash where they encounter Greensleeves' niece Flora who finds a letter from him about his abduction. Botch heads out in his long ride to intercept the amateur heroes before they can even begin their rescue. Botch convinces Flora to star in some of the nightmares he films, while conning Ralph and Mumford to obtain the magic spring. The dippy duo manage to find the spring, but one of Botch's vultures takes it back to him, however Ralph and Mumford's fairy godmother(or "FGM")appears to let them know how they were both duped. FGM gets superhero Rod Rescueman to help them bust into Botch's HQ, free Flora and Greensleeves, plus stop Botch's plan to unleash a chain of nightmare bombs upon the sleeping Rushers.

The original theatrical release of Twice Upon A Time was not exactly successful for the soon defunct Ladd Company, but its publicity as a "George Lucas" movie helped keep it afloat until fans fell for it on cable TV. There are in fact several cuts of the movie, some which included extra scenes, but most of the re-edits deal with the improvised dialogue as there is a bounty of adult humor used by the cast's initial material. The cast featured veterans like Paul Frees, and Lorenzo Music pre-Garfield, who helped bring a sense of maturity to what would seem to most viewers as a standard fairy tale movie. The fresh change in a somewhat scrutinized form of animation makes for an eye-popping experience.

ANI-MOVIES, *Batman: Hush

Even though it was based on a pre-New 52 DC Comics continuity, Batman: Hush has been rewritten to be part of the current DC Animated Movie Universe that began with Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox. This is an usual fit for the plot as it takes place after films that have killed off at least 2/3 of Batman's rouges gallery, plus as part of the existing timeline which has the Dark Knight as part of the active superhero community, or as yet another chapter in the ongoing saga of Damien Wayne as Robin.

Set sometime after Superman's resurrection, Batman confronts Bane when he kidnapped a child, but the ransom money is stolen by Catwoman, who is under Poison Ivy's influence. Ivy gets away, so Batman and Catwoman team up while following her to Metropolis, where Ivy gets a hold of a special Kryptonite formula to control Superman. Managing to break Superman out of it, Bruce and Selina start seeing each other out of their masks, but a date their on is interrupted by Harley Quinn chases them to the opera with intentions on killing Bruce. Harley was following the orders of a mysterious new villain called Hush who kidnapped Joker, and allows him to escape. However, Batman believes Joker killed one of Bruce Wayne's friends, Thomas Elliott, who previously helped Bruce with an injury. Batman then captures Riddler who clues him in on Hush's intentions, which Batman concludes that Hush knows his real identity, and warns Catwoman by revealing his own alter-ego to her. Batman and Catwoman spend the next few days fighting crime together while Selina stays at Wayne Manor. Batman looks into the office of his deceased friend Thomas which was broken into, while Nightwing and Catwoman fight Scarecrow in a graveyard. It turns out that all the villains were either manipulated or controlled by Hush in his scheme to get Batman, leading to a very different climax than the original source material!

Compared to most of the other Batman entries in the "New 52" DCAU, it progresses well enough on its own, but does require you to be at least slightly aware of contributing DC Comics plots, like Lex Luthor now being a part of the Justice League, or Robin not being available since he's with the Teen Titans. One of the biggest things left out was the inclusion of Batwing and Batwoman into the Bat-Family, and don't even get a mention here, despite the fact that Batgirl follows up her brief appearance at the end of Batman: Bad Blood with a gratuitous cameo. This production would have worked better if it had been removed from the DCAU and was in its own continuity like The Killing Joke. The dub is acceptable, with Jason Spisak making his premiere as the Joker, even if only for two scenes in the whole movie. Its worth seeing if you appreciate the more detective aspects of Batman's character, although the stark change in the movie's conclusion might leave a sour taste with some fans.

The Dark Crystal's Archer (Danger Zone)

Wake Captain America when September ends.

Young Justice needs to stop with the "Crash" stuff!

ANI-MOVIES, *Alakazam The Great

Saiyuki, also known as Journey To The West, has been frequently adapted into anime, including a little something called Dragonball! One of the first anime takes on this ancient Chinese tale was a 1960 movie, which a year later was released in English under the title Alakazam The Great. God of Manga, Osamu Tezuka, worked as an animator on the Toei produced film, even though he was billed as a being a director in the U.S. release, which is largely due to the fact that Tezuka had created his own take on the Monkey King as a manga, and then later on as its own TV series. The English dub featured regular voice actors like Johnathon Winters and Arnold Stang, including the anime premiere of Peter Fernandez who later went on to voice Speed Racer, even though Frankie Avalon was billed as Alakazam's voice instead of really just during the music numbers.

The movie follows an extremely streamlined take on Saiyuki, Alakazam is a monkey that is made the king of his kind after finding them a divine palace. He then sets out to learn magic by "Merlin", and afterwards goes the heavenly Majutsu Land to challenge the gods, including "Hercules". The divine King Amo sentences Alakazam to imprisoned inside a mountain until his son Amat(the real star of Saiyuki!)comes to release him. Amat gets the rebellious Alakazam into his service after fitting him with a magic crown, and the two set out on a pilgrimage, which has them gaining allies like the shapeshifting pigman Quigley, and the scavenger Maz. Their journey has them getting captured by the evil King Gruesome, who in the original story was the Ox King. They eventually defeat Gruesome and his hellish forces, which eventually leads to the off-screen end of their pilgrimage.

Even though there was a bountiful amount of promotion done for it's American release, Alakazam didn't really sync with Western audiences at the time. Upon watching it at least once, you can see the numerous translation horrors it had to suffer, like musical legend Les Baxter having to completely redo the soundtrack, but mostly due to alot of the plot points being shoelaced together, as well as a good portion of the dialogue being improvised in the style of later dubs like Samurai Pizza Cats and Duel Masters. Quality-wise, the film has excellent animation to it on the same level that Disney had at the time. Tezuka's influence is shown throughout the movie too, including a cameo by his Phoenix character. The movie has seen release on VHS in the 80s, but most Western otaku have probably watched it on streaming services like Amazon. It's worth a watch as its place in the history of anime, but possibly as a rental or viewing it on a friend's cable system.

Spider-Man is Disney's BITCH!

Alfred finally gets his own TV show...AND THEY KILL HIM OFF IN THE COMICS!!!

Fat Thor "ironic" cosplay

ANI-MOVIES, *Kubo And The Two Strings

After ParaNorman, Laika's next movie digs deep into Japanese mythology with Kubo and the Two Strings. Keeping up the rare art of stop-motion animation, the former team behind A Nightmare Before Christmas crafted together an eye-catching masterpiece that appeals to fans of old samurai opera, as well as some anime.

During the age of samurai, Kubo is a young boy with a missing eye who lives with his estranged mother in a cave near a village where he spends his days working as a storyteller, using his supernatural skill to manipulate paper(similar to Read Or Die)to move pieces of origami while playing a Japanese guitar. Kubo is told by his mother to always come home by sundown, because his grandfather the Moon King wants to steal his other eye, although he does get late one night with his two aunts being sent down to capture him. Kubo's mother manages to rescue him, but at the cost of her own life, magically sending Kubo to an escape. He is awakened by a talking snow monkey(called "Monkey")who was sent to him by his mother using the last of her magic. Monkey tells him they need to find the three pieces of a mystical armor that is the only thing that can protect Kubo from the Moon King. Along their journey, they add to their ranks a large beetle(called "Beetle")who believes he was formally a samurai working for Kubo's father, a shogun that fell in love with a moon goddess. Their quest has them battling a giant skeleton, sea monsters, and Kubo's relentless ninja aunts. The final battle between Kubo and his grandfather doesn't end the way you would see in your standard samurai epic!

This was a true modern day fantasy feast! It is heavily into feudal Japan folklore, featuring rarely used creatures like the boney Gashadokuro, and deities from the moon seen in stories like Princess Kaguya. Bumblebee director Travis Knight started out on this production, and this shows why the Transformers looked so much better as he proves his prestige quality towards animation. Arianne Sutner co-produced Kubo went on to direct Laika's next project, Missing Link. Most of the cast is good like Charlize Theron, plus an unusually tolerable Matthew McConaughey. Kubo And The Two Strings is an engaging Tolkien-esque quest that shows how the ties of family can bind and break a person's life, and the people around them.

MISC. MANGA, *Radically Rearranged Ronin Ragdolls

Meant to be the in-universe project that character Shane Bookman was working on in the Drawing Blood crowdfunded graphic novel by Kevin Eastman, the co-creator of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles actually did release this as its own TMNT-styled homage/parody, but this time its in full color, and with a trio of catgirls! This manga-themed one-shot was published by the rarely active original home of the Turtles, Mirage Publishing.

Three humanoid feline fatales named Tezuka, Otomo, and Miyazaki(all taken from anime creators)secretly fight crime as mutated swordswomen. The catgirls were regular kittens that were part of a secret underground genetics project, they managed to escape their mutant-making facility to get adopted by an Asian-American couple running an inner-city sushi restaurant. As they grew, the sisters were taught fighting skills by their adopted parents, while becoming fans of old school anime. They put their skills to the test when they clash with the drug-pushing villain Overdog and his ninja posse.

This anime-inspired special works great as a more up to date remake of the 1st issue of the original Turtles comic book. It makes for a nice addition for fans of independent 80s comic books, and the early days of translated-English manga in the States.

ANI-MOVIES, *Batman Vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

With Disney locking down Marvel heroes with no signs of intercompany crossovers, Warner Bros. and Nickelodeon cut through all that red tape with a trio of team-ups between The Dark Knight and the Heroes in a Half-Shell. This the first time DC Comics officially had an animated team-up with characters from a completely different publisher, even though they've had some with other cartoons like Scooby-Doo and The Brady Bunch. Ben Jones, who directed Batman: Brave And The Bold, acts as producer in this hard "PG-13" blending of both Batman and TMNT lore.

The Foot Clan goes to Gotham to steal tech for the League of Assassins, which in turn, Ra's al Ghul promises to share the secrets of his mysterious life-prolonging Lazarus Pit with Shredder. The Turtles follow the Foot, and clash briefly with Batman(making for the "Vs." part of this title), but manage to track Batman to the Batcave, which is impressive since most of the resident criminal masterminds haven't ever pulled that off. Batman agrees to let the Turtles tag along with him, Robin(Damian Wayne), and Batgirl as its revealed that Ra's traded some of Shredder's mutagen to Joker in exchange for his Joker venom. The Caped Crusaders and TMNT arrive at Arkham Asylum to find the patients have been turned into half-human animals, and a new cobra-like Joker mixes his venom with the mutagen to change Batman into a rampaging Bat-Man-Bat! The Turtles help Robin and Batgirl return Batman to normal, then subdue Arkham's residents. The collected heroes realize that the Foot and League plan on using Joker's venom/mutagen to transform everyone in Gotham into insane mutants, so after an inspirational speech by Raphael, both teams rev up the Batmobile and Turtlevan to stop Ras's and Shredder's army of mutant ninjas.

This was an impressive production for WB and Nickelodeon, which is way outside the scope of Nick's normal family-friendly programming. There's some strait up bloody violence with Shredder flat-out murdering some citizens. The movie is slightly different from the original mini-series, like having both the Turtles and Batman be in the same universe as opposed to pan-dimensional wormholes. The addition of other characters like Batgirl and Baxter Stockman help flesh out the cast, although it was a small shame not seeing the Penguin getting turned into an actual penguin. There were two other follow-ups to the comic book mini-series, including one crossing over the animated version of both shows, but the movie has an original ending that could make for a groundbreaking sequel if it ever gets made. The casting is top-notch too with all four of the Turtles being voiced by actors who've never played them before, plus both Batman and Joker being played by Troy Baker whose done Joker in Batman: Unlimited and Assault On Arkham as well as the original Lego Batman! The film quality is above-average too, even though some of the character designs are slightly off-model, especially most of the Turtles having almost no facial features. This crossover is so far the best cross-company team-ups ever made!

Somewhere, Gonzo the Great is masturbating furiously to this!

I can't believe it's only Wednesday!

The Lion King remake! MY GOD!

ANI-MOVIES, *G.I. Joe: The Movie

Since Transformers and My Little Pony got their own full-length animated motion picture in the mid-80s, then Hasbro felt it was worth doing one for the last of its Big 3 sellers. However, since the 80s were saturated with non-Disney animated films, G.I. Joe: The Movie was instead released directly to video, making it one of the first American "OVAs". Conveniently though, it was largely produced by Toei Animation, along with additional help from Sunbow and Marvel Entertainment.

After one of the most spectacular movie openings ever with Cobra trying to bomb the Statue of Liberty, the ruthless terrorist organization is contacted by a mysterious infiltrator named Pythona. She convinces Cobra's emperor Serpentor to take G.I. Joe's latest gadget, the Broadcast Energy Transmitter, which is capable of sending energy through an all-terrain vehicle. The Joes manage to keep the BET out of Cobra's clutches, but some of their crew wind up prisoners of Pythona's people, a subterranean race of bug people called Cobra-La who originally financed Cobra Commander's forming of Cobra itself, but helped them create Serpentor to replace him after so many bungled attacks at world domination. Now, Cobra joins Cobra-La to get the BET from G.I. Joe, who plans to use the device to cover the planet with spores that will mutate everyone into reptile people. The Joe's manage to capture Serpentor, but because of Duke's brother Falcon screwing up, he's sprung by the Dreadnoks, leaving Falcon to get re-schooled in being a soldier by Sgt. Slaughter. Cobra Commander is punished by Cobra-La who turn him into a talking snake, but escapes with Road Block. Serpentor leads another attack on Joe HQ, leaving Duke "in a coma", motivating Falcon and the rest of the rawhide new Joes to invade Cobra-La's underground citadel. A massive fight between the insect-like Cobra-La soldiers and its leader, the snake-taur Golobulus, as Falcon and the other Joes manage to stop them and save the Earth.

Taking place after Season 2 of the original series, G.I. Joe: The Movie sets up a follow-up series produced by DIC, who in the 80s also did Inspector Gadget and The Real Ghostbusters, but it wasn't like Transformers: The Movie where they killed off much of the original cast to make room for new recruits. It's a little strange for the continuity for the series though to take a spec-ops team fighting terrorists to making the real bad guys be a hidden society of mole-men, making it more of a Marvel Comics' styled plot, like having SHIELD battling Thanos instead of Hydra. The animation quality is a slight step up from the television production, especially the giant insect monsters of Cobra-La, but not too much of a departure from the standard norm. If you hadn't seen much of the prior G.I. Joe TV series, the movie does stand good enough on its own if you want to just catch some glorious 80's cartoon action!

Live-action Mulan? THAT'S RACIST!

Storm Area 51, fellow nerds!!

J. Jonah Jameson tells off Truth.com

Spider-Man will return in One More Day. (THANKS, DISNEY!)

Why Excalibur is better than Spider-Man...

That moment you realize that Dark Phoenix ISN'T the last X-Men movie...

True Godzilla Fans vs. Millennials

Get off Kong's lawn!

Game Of Thrones is now over!

What about 2018 Gamora?

ANI-MOVIES, *Justice League Vs. The Fatal Five

Supposedly set in the original DCEU, Justice League Vs. The Fatal Five is modeled and based on the Justice League animated series, which also includes the 90 Batman and Superman shows. It takes the main archenemies of the Legion Of Super-Heroes(whose show was not canon with the DCAU), and brings them into the canon of the mid-00's. Tim Burton was brought back to revisit his take on the DC Universe, with Sam Liu to make this made-for-video film.

A thousand years in the future, the remaining members of the Fatal Five: Mano, Persuader, and Tharok, pull a GTA on the Legion's time machine to go back in time, but the unstable Legionnaire Starboy hops a ride. He ends up in early 21st Century, which despite his gravity powers, he has a specific mental condition that requires medication found only in the future. Batman picks up Starboy believed to be a clueless naked stranger, and for some untold reason places him in Arkham Asylum with all the other super-psychopaths! Superman meanwhile had found the orb the Fatal 3 arrived in, and has Justice League member Mr. Terrific use his intelligence to try to crack the egg. The trio of future felons escape and go searching for the current Green Lantern, a fresh recruit to both the Corps and the League, Jessica Cruz. The new GL is dealing with latent shell shock, but despite that was chosen to be a ring-slinger. Mano, Persuader, and Tharok try to capture her, but the active League arrives to her rescue, along with their newest addition, Miss Martian(which is odd considering that the Justice League show established that J'onn J'onzz was the only survivor of Mars!). Starboy joins their fight after busting out of Arkham, and gets mind probed by Miss Martian to reveal that the Fatal Five remnants want Jessica to help free their other comrades who are now imprisoned on the Green Lantern homeworld of Oa. Jessica ends up giving herself up to the bad guys when the threaten to blow up a whole city with their future tech. She takes the villains to Oa where they bust out the remaining Fatal Five, the gigantic Validus, and their leader Emerald Empress who uses her magical artifact called the Eye to drain the main Green Lantern power battery. Apparently this didn't completely drain the other power rings as Jessica managed to repair her ring after it was destroyed by Persuader, and heads back to Earth to help the League stop the Fatal Five from destroying the sun.

This was an original story which incorporates several different DC Comics story arcs, largely from Legion of Super-Heroes and Justice Society. Its very difficult to calculate where this might fit in as far as the DCAU timeline, like if its during the period when the League had 7 members, or 50, or back to 7 during the Batman Beyond years. There's also elements established in DC Comics' New 52 like Jessica Cruz actually getting her Green Lantern ring from another universe which is never brought up in the movie, nor that she had to share her ring's power battery with another Lantern recruit from Earth. The parts involving Starboy's mental instability were also covered when he was a member of the modern day JSA. The animation is above-average compared to its predecessors, but the standard character designs could use a little updating more than just adding a sword Wonder Woman accessories. The holy trio of Kevin Conroy, George Newbern, and Susan Eisenberg are back voicing the Trinity, so that at least makes it a notch in your nostalgia belt.

Parallel Universes and Divergent Timelines are NOT the same thing!

MARVEL...WHERE'S SIF???!!!! EXPLAIN IT! REALLY EXPLAIN IT!

ANI-MOVIES, *Titan A.E.

For what at the time was Don Bluth's swansong in theatrical animation, Titan A.E. was released in a time when the genre of outer space adventure didn't have much of foothold among young movie watchers. Aside from the "success" of the first Star Wars prequel, there were few films dealing in space swashbucklers, although it proved popular enough for Disney to make their own take on it in Treasure Planet. Considering that Bluth was a longtime on-and-off animator for Disney before going solo with his own production company, Titan A.E. did manage to make a substantial contribution to sci-fi movies. Another point of note is that the screenplay was written by Joss Whedon and Ben(The Tick)Edlund who later went on to make the space cowboy cult classic, Firefly.

In the mid 31st Century, Earthlings are forced to leave their home planet when it gets targeted by a race of pure energy invaders called the Drej. They destroy the Earth, forcing the remaining humans to seek refuge among the stars, becoming subjected to alien races while trying to niche out their own place during a time now referred to as "After Earth". One survivor is Space Ace-lookalike Cale, that works as an asteroid miner, and is picked up by Tek, an old friend of Cale's father who was a brilliant scientist. Tek is searching for a large spacecraft called the Titan which Cale's father created to give the surviving humans a second chance on a new home. Tek's crew of the starship Valkyrie includes the snarky bat humanoid Preed, the kangaroo girl Stith, the turtle-ish Gune, and the only other human Akima who is a dead ringer for Freefall from Gen 13(aka: Magical Drama Queen Roxy). Their star trek has them running into the Drej who really want to wipe out mankind altogether because they fear their possible evolution, which would overshadow their own. Cale has a special compass in his hand while bearing a special ring that can lead them to the Titan. Aside from the Drej, Cale has to put up with some backstabbing crew mates, with other aliens either helping or impeding his progress.

Titan A.E. was important in the field of animation as it was first one to be screened fully in digital cinema, as well as one of the last theatrically released films be done largely in a hand-drawn production. The best feature is the all-star cast of Drew Barrymore, Bill Pullman, Matt Damon, Janeane Garofalo, and Nathan Lane. The flow of the story pads out more like a mid-80s space opera, but does provide some solid originality, including an actually smart security guard!

All you anime people and your stupid journeys, coming through my yard!